*shifts position slightly*
*sickening crunch in 4 different body parts*
Tag: tagged as me
Don’t ever bring this uno deck around me cause if a mfer try swap hands w me and I got uno I’m damn near fading them right there. UNO gon have mfers killing each other now smh
Ironically called “Swap Hands” cause thats exactly what we’re going to do when you give me this damn card. 👊🏽👊🏽
there are only three genders: diners, drive-ins, and dives
mike’s hard chamomile tea
What do french people call a really bad thursday?
a trajeudi
update: if you tell this joke to someone living in france they will refuse to look at you
Gnomeo and Juliet AU where they’re humans living in 14th century Italy
i don’t think i could have a bodyguard w/o falling in love with them
- open doors for me
- buff
- quiet/stoic
- focused on my well-being and safety at all times
- tall + good posture
- lean down to whisper at me
- will not hesitate to punch creeps
- can and will literally shield me with his whole body
Random Toughts 